What NOT To Wear At Glastonbury Festival

After two years of disappointment, Glastonbury Festival is finally back on the cards and my attention has already turned to what to wear for five days of fun in the sun (praying to the sun gods as I type).

Don’t get me wrong, I am fully on-board with the free-spirit vibe at Glastonbury and the unwritten rule that says you can wear whatever the hell you want and no one will bat an eyelid. So I’m not here to be super-preachy about what you should and should not wear (despite the slightly aggressive title of this blog post) but I am here to advise you on some of the items of clothing that may not be wise to wear to a festival. For your own good.

Denim shorts

A controversial item to add to the list, considering as soon as you think of festival attire, denim hot pants ALWAYS spring to mind, however, just hear me out… Comfort does play quite a big factor at Glasto – and for me having a denim wedged in-between your legs, bunching up you know where when you try and sit down is nothing short of a nightmare. Especially if it’s a heatwave like it was last time the festival was on.

Playsuits/Jumpsuits

Only opt for this if you are happy and confident with the move to the side to have a wee motion, because taking one of these down in a longdrop is a no-no. Not only would you be pretty much naked for everyone to peer over and see, you also don’t know what your playsuit/jumpsuit would land in should you lower it around your ankles.

GLASTONBURY FESTIVAL DOWNLOADABLE PACKING LIST

New shoes

The same rule applies for anyone running a race, you should never rock up with brand new shoes. Remember that first day of a new job with those pinching ballet pumps? Or that brand new pair of (hell on earth burning pain) heels you decided to splash out on for a special occasion? Well, learn from those lessons and wear a pair of trusty faves to your festival, or at least give yourself enough time to break them in. And if you’re repping Doc Martins good luck because apparently they are hella painful at first.

Strapless bras

Picture this: You’ve bought a brand new off-the-shoulder ditsy dress ready to team with your chunky boots and party on down in a field. You automatically reach for your strapless bra to keep your puppies in place but with no straps on show. For me, a hard no. Unless you’ve found a miracle strapless bra that doesn’t dig in (please leave me a comment below if you have!) you are destined for a day of pain, shortness of breath and a lasting red mark around your ribs that seems to stay longer than an Ibiza tattoo. Instead, go bra-free (c’mon it is a festival) or opt for a non-wired bikini as having those straps on show may actually add an edge to your outfit.

THE THOUGHTS THAT WILL GO THROUGH YOUR MIND AT GLASTONBURY

Jeans

For most occasions, jeans are more than passable. Jeans and a nice top for a dinner date, jeans and trainers for a woodland hike, jeans, a blazer and killer heels for a business meeting even… but at a festival, the humble denim jean just won’t cut it. If you’re lucky enough to bag sunshine, you will literally melt and if you’re unlucky enough to experience a downpour you’ll probably still be drying off in 2025. Plus, trying to wiggle into a pair of skinnies while cooped up in a tent is my idea of hell.

Anything white

I’m an all black errrryyythang kinda girl anyway, so white isn’t featured in my wardrobe that much, however, I would be extra cautious when it came to any white items when at Glastonbury. Because you can only pack what you can physically carry on your back, outfit back-ups aren’t really an option so only where white if you can be sure it will stay that way. And with messy foods, mud and alcohol in abundance, I’d say your chances aren’t looking good.

Anything precious

If you’ve got something extra special like pricey jewellery or a designer bag, I would highly recommend leaving it at home for the week. Yes, there are lock-ups and from what I have encountered, the festival is a super-safe and friendly place, but it’s never worth the risk. Things do get lost and stolen at festivals so do think twice when packing your valuables.

I hope you found this useful!

R x

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